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Sunday, August 3, 2014

Should I stay or should I go....

The heat of Saturday never cooled down.  The low for my sleep was 80 degrees, a southern hot sticky mess to sleep in.

I could only hope all the post that took me hours to put in Thursday would not take hours to get out.
Sleep was doing me no good, I had so much to do, and besides... I will loose an hour in my day as I cross the time zone again. 

I let the horses go free one last time as I took down my tarp, hammock, and fencing.  

As I took everything apart it was hard not to think of everyone I missed desperately.  It is funny how your mind talks to those whom are no longer with us, these conversations in my mind keep me attached to my ancestors.  Rolling in my mind was the day Paw Paw and I walked and marked off this tiny piece of land for me.  Swinging among the webs in my mind was yearning a breakfast with my grandparents, wreaking of horse smells (from a barn I cleaned each morning), especially if I had a lunch date with a man.  Yes I preferred lunch dates back then, so if I needed a good excuse to get away I could easily make up one to be excused and it sound viable.  I often met the man I married for lunch or drinks (coffee)  dirty like this.  With my cut off jeans, muck boots, and a dirty shirt from the morning chores; without makeup, or shower and free as a bird.  Even then I was what I was; and anyone who was to stick around had to know the truth, the whole ugly, smelly, ugly truth of who I was and am today! 

I found the land pulling on me as I cleared everything. 

I took away trash I had not put there, leaving the place the best I could and better than someone else whom had been there earlier.  (plastic bottles) 

I was eager to get home to my husband, but I desperately wanted to stay, I had just gotten settled, I had just gotten into my camping groove, and I was just starting to really relax. The pull being almost equal had I not had my horses with me, I would have stayed till late in the day driving home with the sun behind me instead of in front of me as it is each time I leave from any visit. 

Text sent, calls made, horses in the trailer; I had to be on the go.... back to the reality of two or three jobs in a day. Animals, Pirates' Lair Motorcycle Accessories, and Ad-Lib Clothing store.   


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