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Sunday, November 11, 2012

I have had SEVERAL things come my way while I have been in my dark place with my physical inabilities. 

Navarre has gone down hill sense all my jobs have come first.

Notification that I have to find a new place for all my hay next year.

I have lost out on an electrical walker for him that I desperately needed... and while Don suggested I make payments... I am not spending money I do not have has always been my response and will continue to be for me and the horses.  While I could have afforded it... it would have wiped out my winter emergency fund for extra hay,  oils, or medical supplies for Navarre.  So NO I'm wasn't going to through out what little cush I have for my kids...

TODAY however all the positive has come back to light... I may have... I just may have been sent a small, light, young person;  who like me just wants to be around horses, can't have a horse of her own yet!   but if she gets Navarre back into a riding shape I will have a light weighted riding partner young enough to handle a young horse, but mature enough to give him good direction without getting into his mouth!

I am so excited that my darkness of this cold house, the feeling in the middle of my back,  has been counter balanced by Sweet Pea smelling my breath, nibbling on my nose (lovingly with her upper lip only) helping me walk up the hill, my toes being bare and dirty in the dry lot.  Sitting on a hay bail that my husband took down the hill for me.    A good friend stopping by for a chat that I hope helped us both.  A truly free space, a place I built for positive energy and a place that has paid me more of that energy in the past 24 hours than I can express though the English language to someone who ? may or may not even be in the same season, chapter, much less page of life and its views...

I am in a better place.
I am going to make it through all this new stuff!
I am going to help Navarre even if I can't do it myself. 

Who could pass up being around a horse that most think is beautiful... being able to create a relationship with him, walk him in hand back to a better state, then start on riding work down the road when we can get more together and assess both of our ideas of his requirements...

I can breath again!
my heartbeat is slower
my mind is racing but it's the steroids... can't get around those at this state... not sleeping but I'm breathing again!

I can finally see all the colors in a single blade of grass again.  I'm seeing things my way again instead of this drab, hum drum crayola five pack box... I've got the full set again!!!!!

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